Thursday 20 May 2010

Big Gay Longcat reviews Doctor Who: Timelash Part One

Timelash, by Glen McCoy, was a two-part story from season 22 of Doctor Who. It starred Colin Baker as the Doctor and Nicola Bryant as Peri. It guest-starred Paul Darrow as Tekker.

Colin Baker was Bayban, a baddy in Blakes 7. Now it is Paul Darrow's turn to be the baddy.

It starts with the Doctor and Peri in the TARDIS having an argument. The Doctor is a very shouty manny here, but he is very silly with his big colourful coat.

On the planet Karfel some mannys are hiding from beekeepers but some of them get caught. One of them gets away but is shot by a blue manny and taken to see the Borad who is a manny hiding in a chair. He has a big chair and it is a bit like my new chair. He hides in it so we don't get to see who he is, that is a secret for now.

Paul Darrow appears! This is when the episode starts to get very good. He has a wig on. He is playing Tekker, who is one of the mannys in charge. They put their prisoners in the Timelash.

Paul Darrow! Also the Timelash.

There are lots of lights going on and off and mannys vanish when they go inside the Timelash, and that is why they are scared of it.

Two of the mannys in charge are plotting. One of them meets the Borad and we see he is a scary monster with a big hand, but we don't see who he is. He turns the plotter into a skeleton with his pewpewpew gun.

Tekker is now the Borad's henchman. He is going to have the other plotter, Mykros, thrown into the Timelash but instead Mykros's friend Vena steals an important amulet and gets pushed in and disappears. The Doctor and Peri see Vena appear in the TARDIS for a moment.

The TARDIS appears in the Timelash room. The Doctor says he has been here before but he didn't know they had a Timelash.

The Doctor meets Tekker.

Tekker looks like he might not be a baddy so he goes and speaks to some alien Bandrils and starts a war with them to show that he is a baddy. There may be some other reason for him doing this but I am not sure what it is, this story is quite confusing.

The Doctor stays with Tekker and Peri goes off with the beekeepers, but then she gets scared by a blue manny and runs away and meets a monster. She is rescued by rebels.

Then a blue manny appears and goes on fire. This bit is very confusing.

Tekker makes the Doctor go and look for Vena and the amulet because he has a TARDIS and they don't.

Vena appears in a house with a manny, Herbert, in it. The Doctor arrives and Herbert tries to scare him away but he is not scary. Herbert gets inside the TARDIS and goes with the Doctor and Vena to Karfel.

Tekker gets the amulet back but he doesn't give the Doctor Peri back like he said he would because he is a baddy. Instead Tekker orders the Doctor to be put in the Timelash by a blue manny. The Doctor makes an 'oh noes' face and it is a cliffhanger ending!


This is a very good story so far. Although it is confusing it is very colourful and exciting and lots happens. Paul Darrow is a good baddy (naturally) and there is a mystery of the scary monster called the Borad who is hiding.

I can't wait to see Part Two to find out what will happen next with the terrifying Timelash and why do the blue mannys go on fire and who the Borad is and how will the Doctor save the day?

But that is for another day because it is time for sleeps now. Zzzzz

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